Only 11 days to go! It feels like just yesterday I started this magical adventure, but here I am, 19 days later, taking names and kicking ass. I know that just yesterday, I blogged that I felt manly and awesome with my mustache. Well, that was before I ate oatmeal at 10:00 PM last night.
Quaker Instant Oatmeal is BOSS. And when I make my instant oatmeal, it's an exercise in FEEL. Do I read the suggested directions on the box for Microwave Preparation? No. Fuck directions. I'm a MAN. So, I tear open TWO packets, pour the contents into a bowl, and then fill the bowl roughly halfway high with 2% Milk. And then it's into the microwave it goes. 2:30 later, it's time to rock. I grab a towel, and carefully extract the bowl. At this point, the oatmeal is still pretty watery from the milk, but when allowed to let cool for a few minutes, it quickly solidifies into the perfect texture for consumption.
And this is where the mustache interfered. Every spoonful, I ended up with oatmeal attacking the highway between my upper lip and nose. Am I a sloppy eater? Yes, I typically find myself unable to eat without making a complete mess. Should I wear a bib for all meals? Probably. So, it was not a surprise when at the end of my oatmeal meal, I looked like a mess, with more oatmeal than hair forming my mustache. It was a bummer because it detracted from my overall oatmeal experience.
And so the bipolar mustache experience continues. I'm like Carrie from Homeland. Manic, then depressed, then manic, then depressed. The mustache is playing with my mind and soon I might require shock therapy to get right.
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