Addiction

I thought I was better than this-  I thought i was above it.  But I'm not.  I have a problem.  I'm addicted to Gummy Bear Vitamins.  

My addiction started innocently enough.  My girlfriend keeps them next to her bed on the nightstand.  It became a habit:  Go to Liz's, and consume one gummy bear before bed.  Great, right?  Healthy?  Certainly!  Because not only was I getting blasted with Vitamin C, zinc, and echinacea, all of which contribute to physical health, but my mental health was improving as well, since one of the last images of my night was that of a cartoon bear giving me a reassuring thumbs up.  It was like he was saying:  "Stick with me, and you'll be right as rain!"

But then... the stranglehold of addiction began to take over.  One gummy bear alone could not quench my thirst for vitamins.  

I began to feel edgy.  Liz would say:  "Steve I swear to God if I have to go to the emergency room because my 27-year old boyfriend overdosed on gummy bear vitamins, I am going to be so embarrassed!"  

To hell with her I said!  Because after all- In my time of need, would she be there for me?!  NO!  BUT WOULD THE BEAR?!  YES!

I tried to convince friends and family that I was okay...

They didn't get it!  

"You guys don't get it!  Vitamin deficiency is the real problem here.  These help me fight vitamin deficiency!  Because THAT WILL KILL yOU!  YOUW NEEAD THE VIDTAMINS DONTO Y;;OU SEE?!?!?!@?L!@!"

I screamed that...

But they all just looked at me funny.

And so my condition has deteriorated.

Today has been particularly bad...  Over the last 12 hours, I have had one of those days where you just KNOW that you are going to be sick for a week.  And so when I got home, I ate about a quarter of my jar-  because I need my Immune Support.

It's just another day in the life of an addict, and this is my plea for help, because I'm slipping.  

Heroin is so passe, but gummy bear vitamins are postmodern.